Saturday, December 28, 2002

An Unusual Style for Topping.

There was a request in the newsgroup recently for more Tops to talk more about their style, what they do, but especially why and how.

While my 'top' style is obviously not a conventional one around here, I still have felt lonely occasionally writing from the 'top' point of view. (some others have done some nice writing here on this awhile back.) I think part of this is the sense I'm violating the old rule "don't kiss and tell". When I was younger it was definitely -not- etiquette to tell what you'd gotten the girl to do, especially once it got very intimate. Certainly Mrs. Thorney was very embarrassed, early on, at my telling some of the things that she did for me and some of the things she let me do to / for her.

There is, in telling 'top' things, a definite sense of bragging, which one is -not- supposed to do, and I (and eventually she) got comfortable only when people really reassured us that they found it encouraging to hear how much fun one could have at our ages (approaching 80 for her and sixty for me, at this writing) and that our different attitude toward things was, if strange, at least refreshing.

Certainly in my recent story "two views" I was trying to capture a male top space (and an imagined female top space, or top space as imagined by male bottom? I got no feedback on that aspect) in a rather 'straight' if uninhibited sex scene.

I'll try to reread some bits of my previous postings and see if I can't say more about goals, planning, why-this, and so on, in the future. I've given the basic points previously: she wants lots of attention and affection, wants to feel sexy and desired. I want lots of sexplay, lots of sex, lots of approval. I also want a strong sense of permission to do all the things that I wasn't supposed to be allowed to do as an adolescent.

So activities (whether in bed or serving dinner) in which I can look, touch, squeeze, fondle, etc., to my heart's content -- and which she is specifically required to display herself, bend, twist, etc., meet a need for both of us.

My requiring her to frequently specifically request attention ( as in "Please spank my bottom, Master", etc.) meets my need for explicit consent as well as giving her a chance to influence the choice of activities (top from the bottom) and let me know what activities are effective for her, what she'd like to have happen more often. I want her hungry for me -- so hungry that she'll "do anything" for me. So knowing what works for her, what her level of excitement is, is very important for me.

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